Sizzling, salty bacon; wrapped around crisp water chestnuts, and coated with a sticky-sweet sauce. These delectably savory snacks are the perfect teaser for your appetite.

Mom Got Drunk, & Dad Got Drunk, at our Christmas Party…

When it comes to our family Christmas party, we only serve appetizers. (To quote Coyote Ugly: “We don’t serve water in this bar!”) That being said, appetizers are typically meant as a precursor to the main course and are designed to whet the appetite.

When translated, the French term: “Hors d’oeuvre,” (an oft-used synonym for appetizer) literally means: “outside of the masterpiece.” This etymology refers to the fact that Hors d’oeuvres, while delectable, are the pregame-eats that you feed to your guests while they wait for the centerpiece of the meal; i.e., the masterpiece (but no pressure).

Chain-Smokin’ While the Stereo Plays, Noel, Noel, the First Noel…

Appetizers, Hors d’oeuvres, Tapas, Starters; whatever the word you choose to use, they’ve been around for as long as mankind has existed. Think about the primitive days of hunting and gathering; when {typically} the men hunted large game, while {typically} the women gathered nuts and berries: most likely snacking on what they found, in preparation for the main feast (I mean, who are we kidding? I certainly would be.)

Send Somebody to the Quick-Pack Store…

In art, we often see Ancient Greeks depicted, just chillin’, snacking on olives and grapes, while they lounged and sipped on wine. (Yes, please.) Later, during the Renaissance, doctors purportedly recommended eating small meats prior to each meal (for those who could afford such luxuries), in order to aid in digestion. Long story short: We humans love food. We love the food we eat before and after dinner. As such, during each appetizer-filled holiday, I can’t help but be reminded of a quote from one of my favorite comedians: Mr. Jim Gaffigan.

“It would be embarrassing trying to explain what an appetizer is to someone from a starving country: Yeah, the appetizer–that’s the food we eat before we have our food. No, no, you’re thinking of dessert–that’s food we have after our food… We eat tons of food. Sometimes there’s so much we just stick it in a bag and bring it home. Then we throw it away the next day. Maybe give it to the dog.”

Jim Gaffigan

We Need Some Ice and Extension Cord…

“… A can of bean dip and some Diet Rite. A box of Pampers, some Marlboro Lights. Hallelujah, everybody say, ‘Cheese.’ Merry Christmas from the family…” On tonight’s Kitchen Playlist: Christmas Edition, is one of the funniest and most relatable Christmas songs I’ve ever heard and loved: “Merry Christmas From the Family,” by Montgomery Gentry. Please forgive its borderline trailer-trash, semi-offensive lyrics, and just appreciate a Christmas song that speaks to the true hustle and bustle, sans the silver bells; and the unintended hilarity that ensues when you bring family (whatever that family dynamic might look like) together, to celebrate. I mean, isn’t that what Christmas is all about? Forget the miles driven, money spent, the gifts wrapped, and the Hors d’oeuvres prepared.

At the end of the day, (each & everyday), it’s all about the time and who you spend it with. I assume that many of you have never heard this Christmas-spirited little ditty, therefore, I have included the audio link below. (Despite my extensive research, I was unable to locate an official music video for this song.) Please feel free to listen and enjoy, while you prep and bake these Bacon-Wrapped Water Chestnuts Appetizers.

Ingredients for Bacon-Wrapped Water Chestnuts

• 2 lbs. of thick-sliced bacon
• 2, 8 oz. cans water chestnuts, drained and patted dry
• 8 oz. bottle chili sauce
• 2 Tbsp. ketchup
• 1 1/2 Tbsp. Worcestershire sauce
• 1/2 c. packed brown sugar; plus 1 Tbsp. brown sugar, divided
• Toothpicks
• Parchment paper

Instructions for Bacon-Wrapped Water Chestnuts

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees Fahrenheit.
2. Line a 9×13 inch pan with parchment paper. (You’ll thank me later.)
3. Cut each bacon strip in half. Wrap around a water chestnut, securing with a toothpick and place on parchment paper-lined cookie sheet. Repeat these steps until all water chestnuts are wrapped in bacon and placed on the parchment-lined pan.
4. Bake for 30-45 minutes, or until bacon becomes crispy.
5. While baking, whisk the chili sauce, ketchup, Worcestershire sauce, and brown sugar in a small saucepan over low heat until well-blended. Remove from heat.
6. Remove bacon-wrapped water chestnuts from oven. Then, carefully remove the parchment paper, with the bacon-wrapped water chestnuts from the sheet pan, draining off any excess bacon grease, if necessary. If preferred, you may simply remove the bacon-wrapped water chestnuts from the current parchment paper-lined pan in this step.
7. Place the parchment paper and bacon-wrapped water chestnuts onto a new 9×13 inch pan or cookie sheet with edges.
8. Top each bacon-wrapped water chestnut with the prepared sauce.
9. Using your fingers, sprinkle each saucy bacon-wrapped water chestnut with the remaining tablespoon of brown sugar. This will create a crystallized glaze.
10. Return the bacon-wrapped water chestnuts to the oven. Bake for an additional 30 minutes, until sauce begins to thicken, and brown sugar begins to caramelize. Serve warm.

Get More Sauced

Want more awesome appetizer recipes? Check out my post for Stuffed Mushrooms with White Wine Bearnaise Sauce on Sauced. For your convenience, I have included the direct link to the recipe below.